Leaderboard

Rank Username Score
1 Sledgie 49
2 J 20
3 MrH 10

New Jokes

I gave my handyman a to-do list,

but he only did jobs 1, 3, and 5.

Turns out he only does odd jobs.

1

The lollipop lady helped me clear snow

off the car this morning ,

The collision did shake a fair bit off .

1

I take my morning coffee ,

like an American cop ...

Black , with a couple of shots in it.

1

Down the pub last night -
I nearly had the Trivia Competition
done & dusted ,
till the very last question...
which apparently was wrong.
The question was,
"Where do women have the curliest hair?" Apparently, the correct answer was
in the West Indies .

1

If I knew I was going to be this thirsty today...

Id've drunk more last night .

1

Whats black and blue and hates sex?

A rape victim

1

DAM ...

It's so cold outside ,

Starmer has his hands ,

in his own pockets .

1

I took one of those sex questionnaire's earlier,

It took a while,

but in the end,

I was surprised to learn ...

I was being released without charge.

0

It's that time of year ,

When someone has to go down to the cellar ,

To Defrost Mariah Carey .

Be careful thou , she's a bit cranky ,

Till she gets a basket full of puppies ,

Have a good Christmas folks -

I'm off to stuff the Turkey with my special Mayo .

2

The BBC would make a really good secret agent ...

No matter how they are interrogated ,

you will never get the truth out of them .

2

Isn't the phrase 'Good Golly' an oxymoron?

3

"Do you have any change for a cup of tea?"

"Yeah, try Coffee..."

2